“Do you know what I want?” Preschoolers’ talk about desires, thoughts and feelings in their conversations with sibs and friends

Individual differences in children’s talk about inner states are striking, but how
should they be interpreted? This study used transcripts of preschoolers’ conversations
with siblings and best friends to address this question in two ways. Our first aim
was to elucidate the exact nature of individual differences by contrasting categories
(emotion/desire vs. cognitive state) and referents (own vs. other/shared) of inner state
talk. Our second aim was to compare performance vs. competence views of inner
state talk by exploring (i) the stability of individual differences in inner state talk
across different relationships and (ii) the cognitive correlates of inner state talk. A
sample of 44 children (mean age/4 years 3 months) was observed for 20 minutes at
home playing with a sib and for 20 minutes at school playing with a best friend.
Videos were transcribed and coded for the frequency and form of inner state talk
(e.g., talk about different categories of inner state, or about own vs. others’ inner
states). During the school visits, children completed a set of tasks tapping theory-ofmind
skills and verbal ability. Individual differences in inner state talk (especially
reference to others’ inner states) were stable across relationships. There was no
association between individual differences in talk about cognitive vs. emotion/desire
states, although both categories of inner state talk were significantly associated with
individual differences in children’s theory-of-mind skills.